Clarity and Confusion.

I have made some very important life decisions today:

1. I WILL go back to school for a teaching degree. I haven't decided what grades. But I decided I can't let one bad experience at a terrible high school ruin it for me. If I decide later on that I really don't want to teach well, at least I know it is for real and not because of one student.

2. I have to ride an elephant one day. I brought the boys (I'm an au pair remember?) to the zoo today and we watched the elephants for a good half hour. They are really amazing creatures, probably the most amazing to grace this planet. And for such a big animal they pretty much seem mild tempered. Don't get me wrong though, monkeys will always be my favorite animal. But it was too cold out for them today, so to make up for it I bought a monkey mask. Yes, I am 5 years old at heart.

3. I want to write a novel. I was looking back on this blog and realized that some of this with some editing could be a pretty witty chick lit novel. I need to brush up on the writing and my embellish somethings. But then who doesn't? I don't want it to be totally 100% my life anyways. What do my fellow readers think? It probably won't happen for a REALLY long time though because I don't really have the motivation to do so, I'm a pretty lazy person when it comes down to it. But one day...I want to accomplish this.

4. I like Shy Guy. After out date last night it was decided. But like all guys, I am confused by him. HE asked ME to a nice restaurant, so I assume that he does like me also because he wanted to see me again and spent a lot of money on dinner. He also didn't pick me up though. But he did pull out my chair for me. But then he only gave me a hug at the end. He did pay for it, no questions asked. But he didn't walk me to my car or tell me he would call me or anything. GUYS CONFUSE ME. I HATE THIS GAME. I wish everyone could just be like "I like you" or "I don't like you." And everything would be settled. I would totally do that if it didn't freak people out. Maybe I should try it one day though.

5. On that note, I've decided that with the guys I've been meeting I need to be 100% myself and not try to put on some show to get a guy. I will be me, I won't try to be some sweet delicate flower. Or you know how some women act differently around the guys they like? Well, I'm guilty of that and I'm ending it RIGHT NOW. If I've had a bad day I will be bitchy. If I want to get black out I will. I will be weird and crazy and if they can't handle it, then they can hop on the next bus!