and the list goes on.

So I was going to wait until tomorrow to continue this list of past guys. But I decided I was having too much fun to stop now. Where was I? Oh yeah, the Biggest Mistake. Well after him things got complicated. I was hurt by him because he trampled over my emotions for over 9 months and I was finally free of him. So I made my rounds with various guys that don't deserve more than just a few words.

Name: The Concert Lawn
Story: Made out on the lawn of a FOB concert. Then met up a couple other times to hook up. He was a past high school crush and I was thrilled that he finally liked me. He moved to the city though and we haven't spoken since.


Name: The Metro
Story: We hooked up one drunken night while my friend was passed out in the other room, he wanted my number but I "forgot" to give it to him. We hung out a few other times but that's all.

Name: The Player
Story: The Metro's friend. He had a girlfriend but at this point in my life I was so mentally messed up by Biggest Mistake that I didn't care. He left right after we hooked up and I never saw him again.

Then there were bigger ones that summer...

Name: The Old Man
Time dated: We weren't officially a couple but we dated for about 2 months. I know it shouldn't count but it was high emotion.
Our story: I was working at an insurance company and would talk on the phone during my lunch break to my friend in the conservatory of the building. There were always a ton of people there, a lot of bike couriers taking a break from the hot city. I started to notice this one guy looking at me whenever I was down there so I would smile at him and finally one day he asked me out to lunch. It was a good time and we started having lunches together...when out found out that he was 10 years my senior!!! Okay, I should've stopped there. But he was so nice that I didn't want to give up because he wasn't letting the age thing stop him. We had fun we climbed a mountain, we went to the beach, he made me dinner, we drank and had good sex. But then the summer started to wind down and I asked him where we were going. I was leaving in 4 weeks for my junior year of college. He said that he couldn't do long distance because he needed someone physically there for him. Then it ended.
Where we are now: Story to be continued....

Name: The Alcoholic
Our story: After the Old man I was heart broken for the second time that summer. I cried for a week at my second job. The Alcoholic who was seeing my friend earlier, but that had ended badly for him just about the same time. Then one night two sadly lonely people got together got wasted and hooked up and continued to hook up/date until the end of summer. We tried to make it work while I was at school, but he didn't understand that even though I only had classes for 3 hours a day my day didn't end there, I had my babysitting job and homework and hanging out with friends and meetings-he didn't go to college and just got mad when I didn't have time to talk. The relatioship was too new to really last through long distance and I found a great interest in the male swimmers body.

So that was my real official relationship. I've been single ever since then. But guys have come and gone.

Name: The Roommate
Our story: That winter break I started hanging out at my friend BBF's apartment a lot because there were no parents around to stop us from underage drinking. Well, BFF had 2 male roommates, one taken one single. and the single took an interest in me. We hit it off and started talking and hanging out without BFF around. It seemed good, but she told him about my past so he became too scared to take it any farther. I went back to school and we still talked. I wanted to make it more, but he didn't so we fought and it ended. To be continued...

Name: The Old Man part 2
and it continued...: I went home for spring break junior year and went into the city one day to have lunch with my mom and I saw The Old Man's friends and the place where we worked and got all nostalgic. I texted him but he didn't respond until it was too late to actually see him. But we hit it off again over the phone and started talking almost every night. I thought maybe someone was coming back into my life for good. I was wrong. As the time got closer to me going back home for the summer, he started calling less. Until finally when I got home he didn't respond at all to my calls, texts and emails. Finally, our story ended and not happily ever after.

Name: The Roommate part 2
and it continued...: Clearly at this point I really just wanted to find someone to date. One drunken night I blacked out and made out with the Roommate again. He still liked me and I thought maybe since I made out with him that I had some repressed feelings for him. We went out on 3 dates and there was nothing. I was about to leave for England to study there for awhile and told him that if we still felt the same when I got back maybe it would be something, I knew there wouldn't be anything. So I left him with his hopes up. Oops.
Where we are now: I still run into him a lot because BFF is dating one of his friends. But not as much because BFF moved out. It's pretty awkward when we do meet up though and he always proceeds to get wasted. I feel really bad because he obviously isn't over it.

Name: British guy of my dreams aka The Brit
Our story: So I left the Roommate back on the other side of the ocean and ventured into the land of sexy accents. Where I met The Brit, we was our bartendar where we would go every wednesday for karaoke and I would proceed to get really drunk and sing bad 90's tunes at the top of my lungs. Well he still thought I was cute, despite having no singing voice and he had a gf. That relationship was going south though, and after resisting my advances he finally gave in. We went out basically on a 20 hour date, lunch break for class, dinner and drinks. All ending with us seriously just cuddling. It was amazing. I fell for him and hard. He was torn because he didn't want to break up with his gf over the phone. Finally, he did break up with her and we finally kissed and hooked up. And it was the most amazing night of my life. Unfortunately it was at the end of my stay and I left wanting more. However, we kept in touch over the summer and I fell in love with him. We made plans for me to visit him in Italy and we talked everyday. But then he called me one night and told me he made out with another girl. We weren't really dating, but he felt really bad and things went downhill. We stopped talking everyday. I considered cancelling my trip. Finally, there were 2 weeks without a word from him and I was going crazy. He finally sent me a message on my birthday. Then nothing for another two weeks. I was heart broken. Coming home from the bar one night I wrote him an epic email telling him just how broken I was. Nothing from him for a week. Then he tried to call but I was looking for a job and had an interview so I couldn't talk. That was it from him. I have sent him messages asking him to please still talk to me. But I haven't heard from him for two months.

Name: The Teacher
Our story: Another older man entered my life during the crazy time of The Brit. He graduated from my school several years before me and was back for an alumni weekend. We met the first night and I knew he wanted to hook up, but I was still torn up about The Brit, so after hanging out for awhile I ran away. Of course the next day, while sober I ran into him again when hanging out in a friends apartment. He was funny and a lot better looking than I remembered. So I decided to let him know I was interested. After I left I texted my friends BF who is friends with him and he of course passed on the word. That night when pregaming he came to my friends room with her BF to hang out. We were inseperable the whole night, literally. In the morning he asked for my number and left. I thought I would never hear from him again. But a week later an unknown number popped up and it was him. We talked until 3 in the morning and almost everyday after that. He even got upset when I hadn't talked to him in a couple days. But he was a Teacher and never had time to actually come see me again. We did go out on a date when I was in his part of town. But then nothing. Ran into each other at a party but there was a girl that likes him and sabotaged any chance I had with him. We don't talk anymore.


Where am I now?: Sadly, I am still hung up on the Brit. I never had real feelings for The Teacher even though I thought I did. I made out with a couple guys in the meantime but none of them meant anything and I met a really nice guy the other night. But I just wasn't interested (he was really really short!) I think about The Brit everyday and wish I had given him a chance to explain himself. I thought this was supposed to get easier, but it hasn't especially as the time gets closer to when I was supposed to go visit him. This morning I sent him another message telling him this in hopes of hearing someting back. But I doubt I will. I know it would have never worked because we're just too far away. But I really feel like he was the first guy I ever really loved because we had so much in common. I miss him more than anything in the world. I know this sounds sappy coming from the girl who went through so many guys in such a small period of time. But I never got hung up on any of them like I have with The Brit. I know that nothing will ever be the same. So I will continue my search for his American Doppleganger.